Clouded Questions

Clouded Questions

Mar 11, 2021

I don’t know why I do all the things I do. 

Do you ever ask yourSelf Why?

If not, please ask “Why?” and never stop playing with curiosity. I promise it doesn’t always kill the cat…

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Why do I send you messages that may be lost in translation?

Why do I always seem to kill new career paths when they’re on a trajectory for full liftoffs?

Why do I have to make it My Way when I know other ways can work well?

Why do I send people money who I don’t really know?

Why do I worry how my future will unfold when I move back to Cali?

Why do I know that The Sas gave me everything it was supposed to gift?

Why do I imagine alternate timelines I’ve lived or living?

Why do I create storyworlds that I’ll never share with the public?

Why do I collapse inside myself on certain days which blockade love and light?

Why do I often compile new blog posts on the day before new thought contagions are required for broadcast at 4:40am?

Why do I see so many 4’s and 1’s in all of my life sequences?

Why do I document my life’s search for synchronicities and meanings?

Why do I find peace knowing that I fulfilled one of this life’s core programs which was to be a loving Father?

Why do I dream so deeply for you to become lucid to the story of your life?

Why do I feel like this realm has never been home?

Why do I position myself as a stranger in a strange land by saying strange statements while simultaneously witnessing the strangest things?

Why do I daydream seeing my essence in Light but refuse to manifest it thus far?

Why do I question everything I’ve ever believed on 3/11 while I’m reassessing EVERYTHING?

Why do I dislike their eyes watching me while I navigate public without a mask?

Why do I continue to have faith in new truths and possibilities?

Why do I maintain Hope in Humanity to live Happily Ever After?

Why do I wish to a Creator for blessings in my life and everybody else’s, too?

Why do I ask so many questions and even had bosses say, “Why do you ask so many questions?”

Why do I disclose things to you that I’ve never told anybody else in the whole wide world?

Why do I have friends who stay in contact when I wonder why they want to stay connected?

Why do I have an issue charging for services or items I create versus slanging products produced by corporate entities?

Why do I have hundreds of half-started blog posts and articles drafted that may just make up more volumes of Mental Particles?

Why do I still fear becoming who and what I seemingly see I need to become? 

Why do I get lost in place and watch the sky screen looking for stars to rise versus fall?

Why do I slumber with my body twisted and often wake up more tired after dreaming than at night before sleeping?

Why do I primarily get spiritual downloads when I’m in water, mostly the shower, which is why I got a pencil with a waterproof pad?

Why do I trust my consciousness is rising in these trying times despite not knowing what my future holds?

Why do I get so fascinated by personal and external paranormal, supernatural and odd experiences?

Why do I desire to be special, gifted, wanted, unique, illuminated, wise, etc?

Why do I remember that the present is all that exists and that the past and future are simply time travel illusions presented inside the mind?

Why do I see images, memories and sounds inside numbers displayed for me within telephones numbers, street signs, license plates, etc?

Why do I see numbers inside characters?

Why do I love ya when we’ve (seemingly) never met?

Why do I still sometimes wonder WTF(udge) I’m supposed to be doing with the rest of my life?

Why do I receive answers to life questions, but look away because I’m not yet ready to process them?

Why do I get angry at the world when I see it sinking deeper into madness?

Why do I witness the sapiens welcoming more control which further reduces their freedom(e)s?

Why do I make things that make me wonder Why about almost everything?

Why do I manifest things that at the same time progress and regress my life’s plot line?

Why do I engage in storylines inside the black mirror that knot my shoulders?

Why do I ask so many questions that maybe aren’t supposed to be answered?

Why do I purposefully structure pieces like this One to total 844 words?

Why do I love music so much that without it I would be incomplete?

Why do I have to unlearn so much before I meet new truths?

Why do I suspect that the purpose of this creation is to offer a learning experience unlike the rest?